Hi. It me. Bob Schlomly - President of Kicking Ass and CEO of Taking Names. I'm here with my 500th post of the month telling you how much I hate it that the go-getters are being denied water-cooler comradery like the good old days, as I post this from my childhood bedroom on my dad's old laptop. I have very strong opinions on a very many things that I have never personally experienced but hope to do so whenever I decide to get over my crippling anxiety and become the man everyone told me I could become after I won first place in Ms. Bealer's third grade spelling bee. Work hard, have fun, subscribe to my newsletter and purchase one of my courses that teaches you how to create your own courses and have a great day, champ. The future is you.
I had a candidate reach out to me looking for a new position after a gap in his employment. He was not the traditional candidate, and most would have passed on him, but being the #angel recruiter that I am, I decided to speak to him on the phone.
The conversation that transpired was #inspirational. I learned that he had been helping an old lady cross the street and got hit by a car. While he was laying on the street, a 100lb vulture swooped up and he had to use his fire-breathing abilities to fight the vulture off. He was dropped 50 ft from the air and sustained multiple injuries. This explained his gap in employment.
If it wasn't for my ability to #adapt and give all candidates from all walks of life a chance, this individual would not have been able to find fulfilling employment. Luckily we were able to match him with a fantastic #startup firm as an AP clerk. This is why I love my job.
#GiveEveryoneAChance #DreamJob #PleaseSendMeAMessageForFantasticOpportunitiesLikeThis
or alternately
================================
I had a candidate reach out to me looking for a new position after a gap in his employment. He was not the traditional candidate, and most would have passed on him, but being the #mediocre recruiter that I am, I decided to speak to him on the phone. The conversation that transpired was #beautiful. I learned that he was launching a line of scented candles and got implicated in a class-action lawsuit against big-pasta. While he was running up a large mountain, a furious gorilla charged and he had to use his mother's cookbook to make friends with the agitated beast. He was hugged very hard by the animal and lost all sense of pride. This explained his gap in employment. If it wasn't for my ability to #becool and give all candidates from all walks of life a chance, this individual would not have been able to find fulfilling employment. Luckily we were able to match him with a fantastic #landscaping firm as a data ninja. This is why I love my job. #GiveEveryoneAChance #DreamJob #PleaseSendMeAMessageForFantasticOpportunitiesLikeThis
